This post references the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. Unverified blogs are not a trustworthy source for avoiding misinformation. For updated, reliable information on COVID-19, visit the webpages of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or the World Health Organization.
No plan survives first contact with the enemy. This is a lesson that I had to learn in a hard way over several years. I am by nature a perfectionist, and it took me a lot of experience to realize that trying to plan and control everything in defiance of changing reality is a character flaw rather than a virtue. Once I was able to internalize that, I was not only happier, but better able to apply my talents and energies to achieve things. I still sometimes struggle to find the proper balance. I am still a perfectionist at my core. I want to have everything go perfectly to plan, and finding a happy medium between burning myself out chasing the white whale, and throwing my hands up in resignation because it’ll never be perfect, can be a painful struggle. But usually, once I get there, I am better for it.
One of the things about realizing that no plan survives first contact with the enemy is accepting that sometimes life throws a curveball. That’s not a reflection of your worth; life is just unfair that way. What matters is how you deal with it. Human nature is often to double down on the now-outdated plan. And sometimes that works out. Sometimes stubbornness and perseverance are virtues that can carry the day. But just as often, digging one’s heels in only leads to getting stuck in the mud. Moreover, often when it works out, there was a better option once things started to change. I’ve been having conversations like this with lots of people recently. The world and the future have become very uncertain. Many people are unsure about the plans they made to get where they want to be, if the path they chose even exists. For many, circumstances have changed beyond their control, and plans that seemed solid now seem quite questionable. So, the question comes, what now?
This is usually where my friends press me for my bet on how things will play out from here. But heck if I know what comes next. Like everyone else, I have my own personal bets, which have a mixed record. Back in March, I had pegged mid-July for my over/under on when things would start going back to normal depending on government action and factoring in the known unknowns about the virus at the time. Given the divergence we’ve seen in infection and death rates between the US and Europe, and among the American states, I actually think I was pretty on target here. Of course, if you had pressed, I would’ve bet under, on the assumption that now that people were paying attention, the suppression and mitigation measures would hold and continue, and I would’ve been laughably wrong in retrospect.
The truth is, being “the smart one” of all my social groups doesn’t make me any better at predicting the future. I don’t know what’s going to happen. Life is unfolding day by day, and I’m doing my best to make peace with that and make the right choices as it happens. If that means betting this will all blow over one day, and then taking my losses and declaring that this is a grave threat that needs to be dealt with seriously the next, then so be it. No plan survives contact with the enemy, or in this case, life, and we should all aspire to learn from our experiences and mistakes, and deal with evolving circumstances like adults. As I said, I’m not always the best at finding this balance. But I do my best, and I’m doing my best.
Case in point, I used to think that summer classes were either for remedial schmucks who couldn’t hack it in regular classes, or overambitious blowhards who are so tightly strung that the idea of taking time off is anathema. Summer is supposed to be for travel and relaxation; going places, meeting people, taking care of oneself, and generally having experiences outside of classes, so that by the time one is done with education and ready to go into a career, one has an idea of what it means to live a life. But since these activities are severely curtailed by public health and personal safety concerns, I’ve decided to take advantage of the moment and try to take some summer classes.
Sure enough, you will find plenty of both aforementioned kinds of people in summer classes. And normally that, plus getting up each day in order to sit at a computer and fill out worksheets, plus the stress of being graded, amid summer weather, would be driving me to self hatred. But since a change of scenery is not an option, working on something productive that gives me a leg up for the unknown future is as good a stay at home project as any. Moreover, the fact that everything is online and asynchronous has given me a unique opportunity to knock out troublesome diploma requirements without having to figure out how to slot them into a schedule.
This won’t last forever. Even if things stay online through the fall, the university will eventually clue in to the racket they’ve created by allowing students to complete lab hours through the computer. Beyond that, I will need some downtime at some point before fall semester starts, which is why I’m not planning to take any courses after the current summer session, even though it lets me complete in a single month the same number of credits I usually take over the course of a half year semester. If Fall is on campus, I will need to recover my health and strength, and if it’s online, I will need a chance of routine to recharge my sanity and adapt to a routine of getting up to stare at a monitor.
This is neither about avoiding all possible downsides, nor about charging headfirst into every opportunity, but determining which opportunities are worth taking for getting where I want to be. There’s a trade off and balance. That’s the lesson I’m trying to take from this whole affair. Nothing will make this horrible, miserable pandemic a positive, but if we can take lessons from it and grow, we will better ourselves for when we are able to move forward.
